Midlands Mirth with Brian Stevens

a man is driving his car alone through the deserted countryside when it breaks down. he opens the bonnet, and takes a look...he cannot see anything obviously wrong, and begins to panic because he is miles form anywhere and it is getting dark. suddenly he hears a mysterious voice... 'it's the distributor cap.' he frantically looks all around him...nothing but fields...and again the voice says, louder this time... "Hello, is that Tarby?" 'it's the distributor cap.' terrified now, he checks the distributor cap...and indeed that is the problem. he cleans it, puts it back on, and the car starts. arriving at a pub sometime later, the man rushes to the bar, and shaking badly orders a double scotch. the barman askes him what the panic is, and the man explains about the mysterious voice that diagnosed his engine trouble. At the end of the bar is sat an extremely old farmer, hunched over his drink, looking menacing. 'tell me boy...' the farmer says, 'were you in the middle of nowhere 'bout 5 miles west of here, when you heard this voice??' 'y..y..yes' the man replies. 'surrounded by nowt but fields were ya??' says the farmer. 'er...yes...yes i was sir.' says the man, feeling very spooked. ''appen to notice a horse nearby did ya??' the farmers says, lifting his head to look the man in the eye. 'er.....i...think so....yes, yes there was. a white horse i think......' the man replies nervously. 'white eh?? you lucky b*stard.' replies the farmer, looking back at his drink. confused, the man plucks up the courage to ask.. ''wh...why am i lucky sir??' 'well...' the old man replies, staring into the middle distance, 'normally the brown one is there...and he knows b*gger all about cars.'